Every Sunday, I engage in a lively conversation with a fellow Church-goer about his employment. My friend works with troubled youth but he does it with horses, something he calls equine therapy. I’m fascinated with horses and really enjoy speaking with my friend about his experiences with the youth, leadership, and what horses can teach us about how to lead others and affect change in an organization.
Because of confidentiality agreements, it is difficult for outsiders to come into the facility. I mentioned to him that I would love to spend time learning from the horses and, especially, have the horse teach me about how to lead with clarity, authenticity, intention, courage, intuition and focus — clearly all things that I still sorely lack.
In a moment of Hansei
I believe that my heart is in the right place — it is still sufficiently soft. Yet, I make mistakes that impact other people negatively. In moments of self-awareness, I realize this and feel so badly afterwards.
I have been on my own since I was 17. Has that difficult upbringing and time as a troubled youth baggage that I still carry with me? Is it something else?
I’m really looking forward to spending more time with my friend, his horse, to help me learn more about myself and to help me improve on my still many character flaws.
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Shelly Barson says
We love horses and Jeff says your a great guy. This post is enough to put you on our most highly thought of list over at Pony Tail Club.
Troy says
Pete,
I have to tell you about an experience I had today. A woman came to our medical records dept. and was clearly distraught. Her husband died in our ER only five days ago. She wanted his records so she could prove to the Vetrans Hospital he had really passed away and they would in turn deal with rabid “health-care providers”. I was called in because the staff were not able to explain our privacy policies (actually told her she had to pay to get his records), and the poor lady began screaming at them. I knew the second I saw her that any manufactured emotion would only worsen the situation. As I watched her sobbing I simply imagined if that were my Mom, broken and vulnerable in the wake of losing my Dad. Empathy was the key. She and I worked through the emotions and confusion and she walked away with her husbands records, at no charge of course.
I agree with you that your heart is sufficiently soft – I have witnessed your capacity to care. I consider you one of the highest quality individuals that I know. It may be difficult for you to empathize with people who need you to nurture and cultivate them in their career because you have been so independent. But I know you will learn it. Just think of that misguided youth you mentored walking through the slushy streets of Cleveland who was pushing on for the numbers and needed to be reminded of why we were doing what we did. I have not forgotten.